The Democratic National Convention is currently taking place in Philadelphia, aka the Cradle of American Democracy for White People.* One of the big democracy-related attractions in Philadelphia is the Liberty Bell. We learn about the Liberty Bell in elementary school: How it was kept in the Pennsylvania State House (now Independence Hall) and used during the 1787 Constitutional Convention and other important history things, how it says “Proclaim liberty throughout all the land unto all the inhabitants thereof,” how it has a big crack in it, etc.

Pretty cool bell, right? That’s what I thought before I visited Philadelphia for the first time a few years ago and went to the bell’s current home, the Liberty Bell Center, to see it. And what I found was a little tiny regular bell.

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Look how small that bell is! It’s only three feet tall. By comparison, the Statue of Liberty, another symbolic democracy thing with the word “Liberty” in its name, is 305 feettall.

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This tiny bell is too small to represent the epic greatness of the United States, history’s most awesome country. So I’ve commissioned an artist’s rendering of what I believe would be a more appropriately sized Liberty Bell.

Let’s make it happen, for America.

*But not women

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